Wait, how many miles was that again?? Part1/3

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The place was Yosemite, and the hike was called, Half Dome.

The time was dawn, we all sat at the campground table eating our oatmeal and fresh oranges. Voices were quiet because we all new what awaited us. A 14 mile hike, 8 of which going straight up 100% granite rock, at 8,000ft. I guess you could say, that morning, I was not a “happy camper”. Yosemite officials were asked to rate the hike from a 1 to 10 scale. The hiked ranked in at an 11.

After a quick prayer, and some brief stretching, my friends and I set out to conquer this mountain. As we began to climb I became quickly aware of the fact that I was not in the best of shape of my life, and that Wing Stop had begun to take its toll. I had started the Insanity workout plan , and was now in week 3. However, Shaun T and all of his “Shaun T-Ness” could not prepare me for this journey. Apparently, Half Dome didn’t care that I had mastered the art of a jump push up kick with a side twist into a yoga half stretch while keeping my eyes fixated on a screen. This was going to be a battle of the mind, and a will of the spirit. I would need to re-adjust my mindset, and try to block out body pain, and do my best to focus. After a couple miles it became most apparent that this mountain wasn’t going anywhere for a while, and that I could choose to, as Rafiki so eloquently put it, “run from it or learn from it”. I wanted to use this hike, this challenge, as a symbol for the challenges in my life.
The Dome itself is a huge point formed out of rock that can be seen from miles away. At a certain point of the hike, one can see the tip of the rock starring back at you. As if were telling you, “I’m way too far away, you should just give up now” “Just call it a day, turn around” And if I was by myself, I might have done that. When the stretches on the trail became long, the earth under my feet, the trees, and incline would all start to feel and look the same. This realization would cause my mind to drift, subsequently, making my eyes look down at the mountain before me.

When I looked down, I couldn’t help but think about all the reasons why I could not finish this challenge. I could clearly see under me, to the sides, and behind me. The more I looked at my feet, the more they hurt. The more I thought about how much they hurt only gave more weight to the idea of quitting.

It was if the mountain was all I could see, and therefore all I could think about. I would lose the urge to wonder and imagine what it was going to be like to celebrate when I finally got to the top. Instead of reminding myself what that feeling of accomplishment would be like, the only thing I could think was that I hope I could get a few more feet.
The first thing I realized that I must do was to keep my eyes up. Instead of looking down, I had to make myself look to see where I was going, and more importantly, to where I wanted to go. I had to push myself to imagine, to wonder and to picture the sight of all my friends and I celebrating at the top. For the vision will pull you forward. And it was so. It really is a biological trip, when I would force my head to stay up, my eyes would literally pull my body to the next point. It was as if my body was saying, if you can look there, you can get there. As I walked, I began to pinpoint some areas in my life where I need to start looking up. Areas where I had to challenge myself to see exactly what I wanted the finished product to be, no matter how great the problem was.

Whatever mountain you are on, or situation you are in, remember to do whatever it takes to keep your eyes up. Look to where you want to be, think about it and meditate on it.
Sometimes life’s problems can get so big and so suffocating that it literally can, if we let it, become all we see. The good news is, we get to choose what we want to look at.

“Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you”
-Prov 4:25

Love.
Justin

Will my friends and I have what it takes to get to the top?

Read part 2 of 3 next week!

Thoughts for thought.

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Here are a few excerpts from one of my favorite journals. I want to continue to share more personal things and to challenge myself to always speak from my heart.

Courage is doing what you know you should do before you have to

Sometimes the Love of God is never displayed more brightly then when someone attempts love without knowing God.

No outward circumstance can fix an inward problem

Christianity does not have a monopoly on love. God does

A couch can serve as a place to end a good day or a place where good things end.

If you can’t join them. Beat them

True art will always keep society and it’s people honest

To achieve any level of greatness, our heavenly intuition must become our Godly ambition.

The act of love is better than the idea of love, but is the feeling of pain more evident, and more real, than the feeling of love itself? It seems love’s irresponsible enemy is ignorance, and pains future is always numbness. So which is right, to be lovingly ignorant or painfully numb? This does not mean that the lovers under trees are ignorant or that the poet is necessarily plagued with pain. But wherever we are, let us be honest in that feeling. So that pain does not become powerless and love does not become light.

Love.

First, We FAIL.

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Most nights I lay down and assume that I will be able to sleep properly. I laugh as I write, because I really do try and trick myself into a peaceful sleep, but it just never seems to work out. It isn’t before long that my mind begins to race, and there I am staring at my popcorn ceiling. I usually get up and write some things down or toss and turn to try to calm down my thoughts. The other night as I stared and thought, my subconscious began to drift off and think about some of my past hopes and desires, and ventures of the past that I had worked on, and invested a lot of time in.

I went down the time line of so many opportunities that hadn’t worked out the way that I had planned. Against my better judgments I began to recant all of the efforts in my life that I had “failed” in. My zealous dreams that I was sure would work out, now held no place in my life. I thought of everything – particular relationships, career moves, things pertaining to my school and sports. For me sometimes, it’s easy to just forget about things that didn’t go as planned and just keep it moving. But this night, I wanted to push myself to really take a serious look at some things that didn’t work out, and try my best to find out why.

First, I counted the top 10 things I thought I had failed in. As I began to dissect each venture I decided that calling them “failures” was giving myself too much credit. You see, what I had actually been doing was, quitting. Quitting means not executing, not trusting, and not seeing it through. Quitting is evidence of a lack of faith, and of course faith is when we completely believe in something. I would quit due to a lack of faith in myself or because my dream and vision was not big enough, or compelling enough. I would later find that my quitting was a result of running from my calling and giving fear the last word. Quitting is giving up, and giving up will never ever lead to productivity, in fact, it will never cease to have the opposite effect which is leaving us further behind then where we started.

FAILURE is the result of an intentional effort. Failure not only means, I tried, but I tried well. Failure is the aftermath of a leap of faith, and a manifestation of courage. Which makes us to then ask the question: “Is failure always bad?” Or is it a much needed avenue on the way to greatness? One that we could even be thankful for…

Honest failure makes us strive to push the envelope, and eliminates our reservations as to what is and what isn’t possible.

“ Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better”

 Love.

Justin

You Wrong me Right.

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We have a choice to see what we want to see in people. We choose what we want to believe about them and what we want to focus on. It’s a righteous challenge when we determine ourselves to see the best in people, to entertain their best, and draw from it. This takes a lot of inner self-confidence, and a security level that is oh so hard to come by. In our daily interactions with friends, family members, and co-workers, things about a person will jump out at us from time to time – a flash of greatness, a peace in feeling understood, and even inspiration. However, sometimes the thing that strikes us most is a misunderstood sense of resentment.
One truth has been made very clear to me as of late.
This is, the things we tend to dislike most about others are usually the things we most dislike about ourselves.

“Man I hate it when I do it, but I REALLY hate it when you do it.”

We leave from spending time with someone and a feeling inside us lingers. Hard to describe at first, but the taste the person has left in our mouths and spirits has made their impression hard to swallow. Doesn’t mean we don’t like them or hold proper affections towards them, but something has rubbed us the wrong way. At some point we are made able to see the worst of ourselves in others. This experience is extremely frightening and awkwardly revealing. Interestingly enough, when this happens, I find myself taking on a different role. Instead of understanding that the individual is like me and therefore far from perfect and a human in repair, I go on the pretentious offensive and make judgments based on the little evidence at hand, all to often.

“He’s cool, but he’s definitely kind of prideful, which is fine – no one is perfect”, or maybe…“ She’s a dope girl, but she always has to be right!”…“ They need to learn how to humble themselves and take instruction better”.

These are all things that I catch myself accusing people of on a regular basis while knowing all along, that these are issues I perpetually deal with. If you listen to the things a person continually accuses others of, you’ll soon discover that the person they are really accusing and judging, is themselves. I wonder, how then, can we break such a “normal” habit which creeps into our daily lives so easily?

I do believe that for this predicament, the solution does not lie within us. Instead of practicing a new age philosophy of solely worrying about and thinking about my well being, my problems, and my short comings. I want to be challenged to dwell on others this time. There is a place where we can love without liking. Where we decide to uplift the best in others, and also love the things we don’t like about them. Now this doesn’t mean that we have to accept those things or endorse them in any way, but to call for a substantive change, we have to care, and caring is a form of love. And love, is a steadfast commitment to the well being of another. I don’t pretend to know the exact way to experience breakthrough on this topic, but i do believe there has to be an answer out there. I hope I’m on the right track.

Encouraging you makes me encourage me. Uplifting you, makes me become uplifted. True love beckons us to find perfections in imperfections. If I can teach myself how to uplift the good in others, while recognizing they are human like me, and loving the faults that go with their humanity, I can be a very free individual. And being free is fun!

If I can train myself to love the me in you, I just might fix the you in me.

Love.
Justin

When the Dream does not match the Reality

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After a long day at work or school, we return home tired, but knowing that we have done our best for that day. We may have loved ones or friends waiting at home to encourage us and to bring new life into our spirits. Or perhaps you may even have plans to go out with friends or family to enjoy each other’s company. But then something unexpected happens as we reflect on our day or drive to our respective locations. It’s an overwhelming feeling that in your life, you are not where you want to be. Its an intoxicating feeling, something that creeps in when we least expect it and if we don’t quench it immediately it will continue to spread throughout us. The feeling that says, “ this is not my vision, I know that there is something more for me out there”. When such sentiments set in, what is our typical response? To be sad? Cynical? To try and let it not have an effect on us? Anxiousness?

The prophet Habakkuk found himself in a similar predicament. He knew that God’s vision for the Israelites was that they might live in peace and prosperity. Also, that they would be free from oppression, after years of injustice. But when Habakkuk looked at his reality and the reality of his people, he saw nothing that would enable him to be hopeful or have a positive outlook on things. Habakkuk cried out to God in what is commonly known as “ Habakkuk’s complaint”. He cites examples of where his people are having wrongs committed against them, he cries to the Lord, “ How long, O Lord, must I call for help, but you do not listen?”

Habukkuk’s tone and language sure struck a chord with me. So many nights I sat wondering, God how much longer until you show me how you are going to make this dream of mine happen? When will my door be opened so I can see the vision for my life unfold? Here is what God told Habakkuk:

“ For the revelation awaits an appointed time…. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay”

Your dream and the vision that you know God has for you will come in his timing. Focus on being faithful and to keep persevering through whatever season you are in. Sometimes we lose site of our objective and began to become consumed with all of the little trials in life.
A wise man once told me to only concern myself with the “What” God wanted me to do, not the “How” it would get done. God also told Habakkuk to take his revelation and write it on stone tablets, so that it would be seen. Sometimes you do have to see it so you can believe it. Whatever your dream or vision is, write it down and put it in a visible space so you can see it everyday. This will condition your faith to believe that it is indeed possible, and that God will make it happen.
This week, remember that your vision does wait for an appointed time. Be hopeful, and take a small step of courage and commit to writing down exactly what you want to happen so that you will see it and remind yourself that it is possible, and its coming soon.

LOVE.

Justin

Things to think about:

-My vision will happen in God’s timing

-Worry about the What, not the How

-Write down exactly what the vision is so you can see it, everyday.